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Sun, Sep 28, 2008 7:30 PM
There was a child dedication ceremony at church this morning, and one of the readings was the Kahlil Gibran passage about "Your children are not your children." When the reader recited, "You may give them your love but not your thoughts, for they have their own thoughts," I thought, "Yeah, you're telling ME?!"

A few cases in point:

* On Friday, Elbow Lane had Family Night at Dairy Queen. Katie, of course, insisted on changing out of her school clothes. I sat in the rocking chair and watched as she considered the options. Many of her potential outfits were horrible, and I gently suggested some better alternatives. It was an exercise in futility.

"Mommy, I want to WEAR what *I* want to WEAR," Katie admonished. "That is what kids DO!"

Later, I was trying to subtly propose a different accessory and was again rejected: "Mommy, no. That was not MY idea."

So, although Friday was a brisk fall night, Katie arrived at DQ in a tank top, short shorts, and giraffe-themed rainboots with a Strawberry Shortcake purse slung on her arm.

* Saturday after dance class (a huge hit, by the way), Steve and I suggested we go to Longhorn for lunch. Longhorn is Katie's favorite restaurant. Even so, she was being uncooperative about getting ready to leave. Soon, she was being downright whiny. So we announced that we were no longer going to Longhorn and would be eating leftovers at home instead. She was not happy; her whining quickly escalated into full-blown tears.

"I gonna go eat OUTDIDE all by myDELP!" she shrieked as she slammed open the sliding door and went out (it was raining).

I told Steve to just ignore her, and we ate our leftovers in peace in the family room. A few minutes later, Katie came back inside with all the dramatic flair of an Oscar-winning actress: "I...wad...out...dide...eating...leaves...and rain...bor...dinner!" It was all I could do not to laugh, but Steve actually believed her and expressed all this concern! (Puh-lease!) I shushed him, and we ignored her more and within a few minutes, she was just fine. (Later, he asked, "You didn't REALLY eat leaves, did you?" She rolled her eyes and shook her head "no.")

* In her class this morning, Katie made three flowers out of pipe cleaners and cone-shaped coffee filters. One was for her, one was for me, and one was for Steve. But with Katie, you don't just get a gift. You get INSTRUCTIONS on how and where to use it.

"I want djew ta put dis in djour room," she told me. "On DJOUR dide."

"On my nightstand?" I clarified.

"Leah, and Daddy can put his on HIS dide," she replied. "Dat be perpect. OKAAAAAAAAY?"

* About 30 minutes ago, as I was sitting here at my desk, Katie came in--wide-eyed and enthusiastic--and said, "We gonna do a awrts-n-crafts project, okay? We gonna make BACEJIPS! And den we gonna make lil' princesses, okay? Blue and red bor No White...and lellow bor Belle...okay?" I managed to weasel out of the "pwoject." But Steve is now calling for me--and no doubt surrounded by multi-colored popsicle sticks, markers, and coloring books.

Comments:
Katie H.: My guess was Bracelets???

Marbara: Spaceships? And, FYI, Andrew wore shorts outside all year long.

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Sat, Sep 13, 2008 9:15 PM
There are times when I find myself hoping all that stuff about age and wisdom isn't true. First, I have my mother-in-law always remarking on what a pistol Katie will be as a pre-teen and teenager ("I only hope I'm around to see it, Sue," she often tells me).

Then there was a lady--I'd say late 60s to early 70s--who approached me as Steve and Katie and I were leaving a party last fall.

"Honey, I just want to tell you how much I've enjoyed watching your daughter," she said. "And let me tell you: She won't EVER need assertiveness training courses. But she might TEACH them."

We got another "warning from the wise" tonight at The 99 restaurant near our house. After we finished eating, Steve took Ants-in-Her-Pants outside while I handled the check. By the time I got outside, Steve was sitting on a bench next to a couple in their 70s. Katie was in typical form--scrubbing Steve's face with one of the wet wipes from the restaurant. She was full of vim and vigor, as usual.

The man and woman were watching intently. Then the woman looked up at me and said, "I hope you're both ready."

I tilted my head and smiled, unsure of whether she meant "watch out for the boys" or "watch out for the 'tude." I think she meant both.

"Forget how she looks," she said, waving her hand as if that were the least of our problems. "This girl is a FORCE. I've never seen such a busy child!"

The longer we visited with the couple, the more I realized that the woman herself was probably a force--as a girl and beyond. She was a loud, tough-talking--but still warm--Northeastern woman. She asked Katie a series of questions in a very direct and somewhat intimidating way (I definitely would have found her intimidating as a kid!). But Katie answered all of them without flinching. After the lady kept telling Katie to stop "cleaning" her dad ("You're making me crazy with that!" she barked), Katie got even by pretending like she was going to clean HER.

Comments:
KYGran: Katie, I love you just the way you are!

llie: Go Katie!

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Tue, Sep 9, 2008 4:15 PM
Overall, Katie's transition back to preschool has been fine. However, mornings have brought an unanticipated bump in the road: Katie crying and carrying on like she did when she first started group day care in 2005. Steve and I have discussed various theories (Is she still adjusting from that whole week off in Kentucky? Does she miss the go-go-go pace of day camp? Is it tough to transition from "valet" dropoff back to "Mom walks in with you" dropoff? Is she having a hard time with her new classroom and/or teachers and/or classmates?), but we don't really know what's going on in her brain. Yesterday as she was getting into the tub, she turned to me and said, just as serious as she could be, "Today wad my la't day in da Bawrn." ("The Barn" is the building where the two pre-K classes are held.)

I haven't been sticking around for her morning "performances"; I just shut the door in Katie's red face and walk away. So I asked her teacher how long the tears last after I leave. She said not long. She also said that she then sits with Katie, and as "therapy," has Katie tell her a "story," which she writes on lined paper. There's been a "story" in Katie's box every day. They usually consist of simple declarative sentences: "I love Mommy. I love Daddy. I love my sister. I love my cat. I love Angel. I love to paint. I like the dress-up center." The teacher said she also reads her a book of poems called Commotion in the Ocean, which Katie loves.

Despite the rough dropoff, when I come to get Katie in the afternoon, she doesn't want to leave. And when she and I did some shopping at Wegmans over the weekend, she insisted on bringing in the letter she received in the mail from her two teachers. She sat in the cart and "read" the letter to MoMo (the stuffed monkey). She was raving to him about how much she loves the two ladies. And get this: Her teacher said that yesterday when another child was having a dropoff tantrum, Katie went up to her peer and said in her teacher-like voice, "It be OK...We gonna hab 'nack and den lunch and we gonna play! Djew don't needa cry!"

So, she's sending all sorts of mixed signals, but ultimately, I'm not worried. Just mildly irritated.

* * *

I can't recall how it started, but Katie has her own system for measuring distance/time in the car. It is quite effective as a way of setting her expectations. Basically, you make circles in the air with your forefinger while making a "shush" sound with your mouth. The closer the destination, the fewer circles and "shushes." You denote the destination by saying the work "park" (in Katie's blossoming Philly accent, it's "pawrk"). Anyway, she uses it all the time--including this past Sunday morning.

Around 8 a.m., Katie called me in to her room for a serious conversation.

"Where I gonna be next year?" she asked.

"Titus," I replied, "for kindergarten."

"And abter dat?" she asked.

"You'll be at Titus for seven years, and then Tamanend for three years, and then Central Bucks South High School for three years."

"And when I'm 22?" she asked. Before I could answer, she added, "College?"

"Yes, although you might be out of college before you're 22."

She thought about that for a minute and then said, "Rian [a friend from school] gonna go bar away to college. I'm gonna go shush-shush-shush-pawrk."

* * *

I spent much of Saturday cleaning out our pantry, lazy Susan (a very objectionable term if I ever heard one), and Tupperware cabinets. So when Katie asked me to help her make cookies, I was so tired that I said no.

"Ask Daddy to help you," I suggested.

She looked at me with great skepticism and concern.

"Djew djure he can do dis?"

I assured her that yes, Daddy could handle it.

They ended up making the sugar cookies--the Crayola ones that come with food dye--and had a ball. I'll have to post the photos later.

Comments:
KYGran: Hmm. . . I seem to remember the same promise about some Kentucky photos!

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Sun, Sep 7, 2008 8:30 PM
More evidence that it would be a huge mistake to introduce Katie to any kind of corporal punishment:

The other day, I was really getting on Katie's nerves. Exasperated, she wagged her finger and threw back my own lines back to me: "Mommy, I am NOT press, and I am NOT lapping!" (Translation: "I am not impressed, and I am not laughing!")

This evening, while I brought dinner to the table and Steve washed the pots, Katie volunteered to get us all ice water.

"Can't I have iced tea instead?" Steve asked.

Katie's immediate reply was her adaptation of her camp counselors' saying: "No, Daddy, djew get what djew get and djew don't get a bit (fit)!"

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Tue, Sep 2, 2008 12:30 PM
Today is Katie's first day in the Meadow. As always, I took her picture at our front door. I can't get over how much older she looks. Last year, we thought she was so big. When I look at the 2007 photo now, I think she looks like a baby by comparison.

At any rate, she was in good spirits at home this morning. She was a bit "off" at dropoff, though. Perhaps it was the new building, new room, new teacher, and slightly new routine. Or it could have been a lack of sleep. She got up later than usual because we were at a neighbors' BBQ last night. She had a BALL swimming and playing, but she didn't get to sleep until about 9:30 (oops!). I'm certain that she's fine now, though. And I can't wait to hear all about her day.

Comments:
Katie H.: I hope she has a fabulous first day.

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